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Tuesday of the Third Week of Advent | Kaitlyn Griffin

Christmas is a fun time, but there is an element of sadness for me. About twelve years ago, a close family member passed away the day after Christmas. So every year, Christmas is immediately followed by sadness and remembrance. 

After he passed away, I spent a lot of time trying to figure out why. Given how young I was, I thought it was some sort of logical cause and effect. When I got a bit older, I shifted more towards thinking that maybe God was trying to save him from a sad life.

Now I am in my twenties, and have had many more years of learning about God. My faith has grown and I have been better able to fully appreciate the gift of creation God has given us. I stopped asking why, and started to appreciate the knowledge I gained from the experience that I didn’t realize I was gaining. Knowledge such as how to look past the immediate about a person and be kind to the human they are, rather than cold towards the person they seem to be. Knowledge about how to handle difficult situations, and help others through. Knowledge about myself, what I am capable of, and what I deserve (which is more than I had though when I was younger). My brain is still developing, but I have finally reached a stage where I can look back and see what has happened in my life as a result, and find the beauty in those things. I can now see the lessons I’ve learned, things I have gained, and knowledge I have acquired. So here’s  a note to my ten year old self: it’s ok to ask God why, but just know that you might not learn what you want to learn. God will give you the knowledge He intends for you to know, and that knowledge will help you way more than the knowledge you are asking for. You just have to trust Him. 

And so I pray, 
Dear God, thank you for your gift of creation and knowledge. Please listen to our questions and help us to understand the world around us. But most importantly, please give us the knowledge we truly need to be happy, even if it’s not what we think we need. Amen.

-Kaitlyn Griffin